(yet another old journal entry)
How I was sinking
in my own selfish pride.
My heart to touch,
I longed for Your Sweet Fellowship.
But I was drowning in despair,
Thinking of all the ways I’d become a disgrace.
My heart to hold,
I cried out to You.
If You are willing, Lord,
I want to be healed.
“Are you willing?”
You asked
And thinking of the things I’d done,
I pulled back.
Harboring all those feelings of guilt and shame
that I’d brought upon Your Holy Name.
I don’t deserve it,
I cried.
I can’t stand myself,
I sobbed.
But You were there
Ready to take these feelings of inadequacy–
Longing to hold me once more.
I hid my face and buried myself in the dark
Where I could not feel You.
But You were there
Providing for me
Loving me
Caring for me.
Sending Your children my way to light my path back to You.
