(((REPOST from March 18th 2015)))
God is sooo good!
So, I totaled my car on the ice two weeks ago tomorrow. No one seriously injured, thank the Lord!
I will admit, I was really bummed and kinda down and out about the whole thought of having to give my car up, and “settle” for something no where near what I had–in my mindset at the time. I moped for about a full day. But when I finally laid my fears and worries down at the foot of the cross, He took the weights that were so heavy upon my shoulders.
And He let me see a glimpse of how (more importantly why) He was working behind the scenes 🙂 He was teaching me a lesson or two that I really needed.
1) stop trusting in things and thinking more highly of myself than I ought to think because of those “things”. (Things that He gave me to begin with!)
2) Place my full dependence and faith in God to see me though this trial, and the next. And the next.
Somehow we have to relearn that one from time to time… We forget when we are on our mountaintops that we still need to be fully reliant on God. We start thinking we can do it all on our own, and we start to forget how much we need Him.
The weights lifted even more when I realized that in looking for my next car, I wasn’t going alone. I realized that He’d already provided the car, I just needed to have faith and ask Him for His direction in finding it. Shortly after that prayer, I saw a picture of the car posted online–the car that was going to be mine. I never looked again. I knew He’d provided it, and it was just perfect for me!
Something I wouldn’t get too proud in, something that I could tinker with and fix up as i had the money and time.
Something that ran perfectly, had even fewer miles than my previous car, though it was a few years older.
And, it was the exact price that I got for my now-salvaged vehicle! (He also provided the only place in town that would give me a fair price for it, despite the work that it would take to fix it.)
I went and looked at my new car and I was a little heartbroken to see the shape it was in cosmetically. It needed some work. No doubt. But He provided a friend of mine to inspect it mechanically before I bought it, when another friend was tied up and couldn’t make it. It checked out good!!
I’ve learned that even with the cosmetic damage, it’s a lot like me. It may need some love poured into it, but it’s dependable and it will be loyal to me, and though it has a few dings, scratches, paint peeling, broken door handle, etc, those things are testimonies to its loyalty to keep on keeping on, even on the rough days.
Those things are reminders that we all have mountaintops and valleys, but it’s what we do on those mountaintops and in those valleys that show who we are on the inside. Do we get prideful on our mountains, thinking nothing can touch us, thinking we are above the distractions and hindrances of the world…. Do we keep on going in the valleys when all we see is our beat up outsides, or do we give up?
Do we let what others say and think of us determine our attitudes of ourselves and actions toward ourselves and others?
Or do we keep on being who we know we were made to be, fulfilling the purpose we know our Creator, Father God, put us here to do?
Do we let this world win and decide to give up, or do we hang in there–waiting one day for that new paint job as a reward to ourselves for a job well done?
3) I’ve learned the value of community. The importance of relying on those family members and friendships that He’s blessed me with. And I have been able to reflect on how He had previously orchestrated people in my life in such a way that I could feel comfortable reaching out to them for help at the exact time I would need them.
And then, when i decided to make a minor repair on my new car myself, and I tore up the fuel line because I didn’t want to stop and do research first—-well, after I tore it up, I figured out it was a dealer only–order only–part. So, i was again without a car for several days more.
But, He, once again, showed me how to lay down my pride and ask for help from the people He put in my life to surround me and help me and strengthen me when I was down.
Rides to and from church, legal advice to get the title transfer completed in the meantime, borrowing my friend’s car to get to work and run errands, another friend offering to go pick up my part from the dealer for me… I’ve realized how blessed that I am-He’s blessed me tremendously with an awesome network of family and friends who are ready to help me in my time of need.
I’ve prayed a lot over this little beat up car, and I couldn’t be happier with it! Because it’s a testimony to God’s faithfulness. It’s a testament to His goodness. Sure, he could have blessed me with something much more eye appealing, or even fixed up my old car.
But would I have learned this valuable lesson of trusting my Father, of depending on Him completely when the cards fall? Would I have learned the harsh lessons of crucifying my pride and learning to lean on family and friends, the community that He gave me?
Hmm, probably not. He knows how to get my attention. He knows the German in me is stubborn enough to require something drastic at times. But yet, He’s so gentle and humble of heart. He cares. He loves me too much to see me puffed up in my pride and living independently of everyone else– including Him (in my thought process anyway).
He created me for community. He created me to need Him. He created me to need others.
So, after replacing the door handle yesterday and finishing my fuel line repair today, (and a few more minor things in the last couple of months) I’ve just been so grateful to have my car back, up and running again! And I couldn’t be happier or more grateful for not only my car, but His provision, through it all!!! Even through my mistakes!